Dealing with a mental health problem is tougher than can be put into words; it’s even harder when you’re on your own. I firmly believe that having a good support network contributes hugely to recovery from mental illness, and it is heart breaking to know that some people suffer alone during such a dark and terrifying time.
Mental illness has a way of twisting your perception of the world around you. You can be surrounded by a room full of people offering their help and still feel insignificant, disliked and lonely in a harsh, cruel world. The illnesses thrive off filling your entire existence with self-loathing and terror, telling you that you are different, nobody understands, nobody cares and therefore to turn to negative coping strategies. These thoughts are false, but that’s hard to understand when your entire outlook is being turned upside down, distorted and destroyed. This being said, the positive thoughts you are told, although you may not believe them entirely yet, are stored in your mind. Sometimes reassurance is the first small push you need, and it is these thoughts you must repeat over and over until they drown out the negative ones. You are loved, you are cared about, others have felt the way you have felt and there is always someone there.
Often it is invisible to the outside world, but the distressing reality is that smiles, laughter and being outgoing are not always signs of contentment and wellness. People are very good at masking how they are truly feeling. You don’t see the endless tears, shaking, sleepless nights and the “the world would be better off without me”s. All you see is the front that they wear everyday before collapsing. Putting on this act constantly is exhausting and can be detrimental. Sometimes all someone needs is for a person who supports them to see through the mask and say, “I know you’re not okay,” and open up a conversation. Having people to talk to about everything that is going on relieves some of the pressure, and feeling understood and listened to is imperative.
Unfortunately, some people find themselves surrounded by misunderstanding and stigma directed by family, friends and others. This is why the breaking down of stigma is so, so important. Education and awareness is the difference between isolation and feeling accepted and heard – hugely stimulating recovery. If you haven’t experienced it yourself, you will never fully understand, however you can still understand to a substantial extent. Learn about the illness, find out their triggers, ask them what you can do to help, and the most important thing: remind them that you are there for them; this makes such a difference, as, like I said, mental illness is extremely lonely and scary at times.
I am incredibly fortunate to have a wonderful support system and I am more grateful than words can say. My incredible family, friends and teachers who go above and beyond, really keep me going. It is easy to be dragged into the black pit of thinking you are not loved and you are a burden to everyone and everything, yet your support system are a constant reminder of all of the many beautiful reasons to be alive, and who cares about you so much, even when you don’t care about yourself. They give you further reason to keep fighting – if you’re not staying alive for yourself, stay alive for the people who care about you and love you unconditionally. Thank you so much.
Above is just a small selection of the wonderful people I am so grateful to have who support me. I wish I could include everyone but there are just too many – you know who you are and I am so grateful to have you. Thank you x
Victoria - Highway to Happiness 